Depression is something we are all likely to experience in our lifetime. I for one have had spouts of depression but I’ve managed to come out of them. For some, unfortunately depression hits them hard making them sick for lengthly times. Unfortunately as a society we’ve been brought up to think people with mental health are weak, especially men suffering with mental health (thankfully now things are starting to change). So I thought I’d list a few things we shouldn’t say to those suffering with depression. **Some of these are phrases I have had said to myself by loved onces***
‘There are people much worse off than you’ – By saying this, you will probably make someone you love feel ten times more guilty and worthless for feeling low, try something like : I can see that your struggling, how can I help you?
‘Cheer up’ – Being told to just ‘cheer up’ can often make a person feel like their anxious and depressive thoughts shouldn’t be expressed, although you may not mean it to hurt it can quite undermining. Try saying : ‘I need a walking pal, will you come with me?’
‘Stop crying’ – If someone is expressing how they feel let them, it’s better out than in and sometimes a good cry can make you feel ten times better. Nobody needs to feel the pressure to stop expressing their emotions.
‘You’ll just have to deal with it’ – People who suffer from depression deal with it, every day, saying something like this undermines them and might them feel worthless. Instead you can tell them their not alone, and that you’re here to help.
‘You’re just being selfish’ – People who suffer from depression or an anxiety disorder are already extremely hard on themselves there’s no need to isolate someone further. Depression isn’t a choice.
‘What do you even have to be depressed about?’ – Depression isn’t always caused by a sad or traumatic event sometimes it just happens, this doesn’t give the right to pass judgement you may not know what’s going through someones mind.
‘You just need to get out of the house!’ – When someone feels low they often don’t want to move anywhere let alone get out the house and potentially bump into people they know. Offering support by asking them if they need company is a better way of showing you care.
It’s difficult dealing with depression but I promise it does get better, take each day as it comes and practising mindfulness and meditation can help cope with these thoughts but if you would like further info or help these websites may be of use :
(And if not I’m always here to lend an ear 🙂 )
Just remember, behind every face something may be going on, let’s make someones day by giving them a smile and spreading positivity… #justsmile